Shadows

I spend most of my days in a room with no windows.  I’ve made it homey, but somedays I miss a view.  Needless to say that when I leave work, I’m extraordinarily grateful for rain, shine, shadows, whatever, just give it to me.

001

If green is involved, that’s a bonus:

002

I’ve been paroled from my cave for the weekend and plan to make the most of it.  Nine days of August Break left, so we’re almost home – happy Friday everyone!

Today is…

My day has been many things:

sweet, like when Heidi tried to climb in my lap so I could pet her more

regenerative, as during my meditation this morning

inspiring, by listening to a podcast with a fruitarian!

However, that’s the peaches-and-cream version, all true of course, but where’s the dirt?  In the interest of “keepin’ it real,” as Susannah would say, let’s explore our prompt “Today is…”

Today is…my cluttered desk!  August and September can be like the seventh circle of hell in my office.  I have a lot to do, and I get it done, but my desk ends up looking like this (if not worse) and doesn’t recover until November.

001

Today is…my hairy living room rug.  I have two dogs who LOVE to roll on the red rug.  Every night before bed I vacuum it, and every day when I come home from work, it looks like this:

002

Today is…not knowing where to start.  I took a stand at work about the location of a meeting we were having; several of us had huge objections about the proprietors of the business.  I ended up not having to attend and I am happy that I spoke up, but it also put me ‘on the radar’ so to speak.  I’ve no regrets about it, but also I’m not sure how to process it yet, or write about it apparently:

003

What was the down and dirty of your day?

Little graces

So, my boss was fired on Monday.  Cue anxiety and butterflies in my tummy.  We both expected it – it seemed to have been in the works since January, but I have never thought that there is a way to prepare yourself fully for major upheaval.

Last night, I came home to this sky:

001

It reminded me of what my grandmother called ‘little graces’ – those things that see you through, soothe the jagged edges, even though you may not notice them at the time.  This week, they have saved me.

  • Focusing on my breath…deep cleansing ones to calm my nerves, helping me hold my tongue, and reminding me that everything is going to be ok.
  • Unconditional love from my dogs.  Focusing on their sweet, ‘in the moment’ way of life helped me leave my stress at the door.
  • The reactions of my friends and coworkers.  The most common reaction was, “Wtf, are they crazy?” which made me laugh – exactly what I needed.
  • Playing ‘where would you live?” with Edward.  If you could live anywhere, where would it be?  We took turns picking places and finding properties.  Apparently I really need to live near water.
  • Mother Nature.  Leave it to the big wide world to put things back into perspective – we’ve had both big storms and quietly gorgeous sunny days.  I’ve done a lot of looking up and really seeing this week.

So he’s gone – and went on vacation, good for him – and here we are.  Endless gratitude to him for 6 years of leadership and laughter and to life for leading me to my little graces.